Saturday, July 31, 2004

"Its a beautiful day" I said to thewife. She had asked if that was Jefferson Airplane, I was playing. She then agreed that it was a beautiful day. I said it wasn't the weather I was referring to, it was a band called Its a beautiful day. "Ah" she said.

That said, it was such a beautiful day I decided I had better get round to painting the back downstair windows and door. Whole day task its almost time dor dinner and I have worked up a sweat and achieved something.

The barbecues are lit all around us, but we're having kedgeree cos the pork we were going to have hasn't defrosted yet. Time for a bath and wine.

posted by timesnewroman at 5:27 PM  

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Thursday, July 29, 2004

Geoff Hoon - Genius! 

You may well be wondering how I've reached the above conclusion.  Simple really, over the past few weeks, there was the big shakeup of Britain's Armed Forces with a resultant reduction in personnel, yet at the same time the military is stretched across more fronts than ever since the cold war.  How can he sustain this? Speed! Amphetamine Sulphate and drugs to keep people awake and alert for days.  Half the manpower, twice the output. Pure genius really.

posted by timesnewroman at 6:30 PM  

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Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Barr's Barons 

Father Bell is organising a Fantasy Football League and invited me to join. This is my team. Progress or lack of it will be a feature somewhere around here.

posted by timesnewroman at 10:02 PM  

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Anyone who's read a few posts on here is probably aware that Nestl� are not one of my favourite companies. I couldn't possibly go so far as to label them as a bunch of child killing bastards, but I have heard the rumours.  It seems they are not content to corner the entire UK sweetie market.  Now they really have gone a stage further.

"It seems Nestl� had wanted to register a trademark showing the familiar shape of the mint but without the word Polo embossed on it and without any specification of size or colour. That would allow the mint to become less specific and more general, a pink, green or lilac lifebuoy-like thing with the famous nothing in the middle capable of becoming a bigger nothing at will, with the full protection of the law."

Correct me if I'm wrong but a trademark that's the shape of a Polo-Mint, without the word Polo embossed and not a specific size or colour would be.....let me think.........A Circle! Nestl� want to trademark a Circle!!!!!

Fortunately a judge has told them where to get off!

posted by timesnewroman at 9:48 PM  

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Wrong kind of cattle on the line.

Over the past few weeks I have begun taking the train to and from work.  Weighing up the pros and cons it emerges that, its more expensive, but this is offset mostly, by a transcard allowance from work rather than a mileage allowance. I don't have to drive at peak times in a mile long stress filled queue full of idiots that shouldn't be allowed to drive. thewife has the car during the day and can do shit with mumsy. I don't have to get in really early to find a parking space. I no longer have a travelling companion who talks a lot of shite, who was extremely unreliable when it was their turn to provide transport. Also I am not tied to their inflexible start and finish times, nor do I have to listen to their shit taste in music. I get to relax and read the paper, books and do the crossword. I can nod off in complete safety on the way home. I have to get to and from the station at both ends which is a bit of a nuisance, but thewife drops me off and picks me up and at the other end. If I am not late and the weather is okay I can walk so I get a bit of exercise as well. So far, the trains are uncrowded and on time. That was until last night when the 17:30 express, which has only one stop before mine and which should take under a  half hour was 15 minutes late in getting in. The reason? Stray cattle on the line slowing things down. They were all brown these cows. Surely in Ayrshire they should have been like the cows below? 


Ayrshire Cow 



posted by timesnewroman at 5:42 AM  

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Sunday, July 25, 2004

New Toy 

Couldn't stretch to an iPod, what the hell its just something to while away the train journey to work and back along with a good book and the Guardian Crossword (somedays).

Comes prepacked with the Carpenters- Yesterday Once More complete with Karaoke style simultaneous lyrics that thewife sang happily along to.

Got home and begun to try to install the software onto PC. PC said no, ejecting the supplied disc several times from machine. Tried everything, tried DOS. My guess is there is nothing on the disc but can't tell. Start looking for the driver on the internet and find it. Install. No guidance for using the software so I try the most likely executable file. It cant find the removable drive. I go into control panel and tinker about eventually it recognises the drive but it's "locked." (turns out this is a good thing as I learn later.)  Eventually I find a new updated manual on line which is better than the one I have.  Its incredible - here is a small sample of it's wisdom:

"6)Troubleshoot guide

Incapability turns on the player.
A)Is has the battery? Please load into the new battery.
B)Is reverse the battery? Please load into the battery by right.
C)Is exhaust the battery? Please replace the new battery.
The key does not work
Is unit in HOLD mode? Please release HOLD mode.
The player opens soon to turn off.
A)Is exhaust the battery? Please replace the new battery.
B)Is unit in HOLD mode? Please release HOLD mode.
After connection the USB cable, can not find the removable disk
A)To check USB cable whether normal connect with the PC and the player.
B)To check USB cable whether is damaged.
C)To check BIOS of the PC whether is enabled ( exactitude is: USB ENABLED, inaccuracy is: USB DISABLED).
D)Is right of driver install, reinstall driver.
E)Your PC main board doesn't?t support USB interface, please you have to upgrade the PC main board driver.
No sound when playing the file
A)Volume too small?and regulate volume.
B)The player has not MP3 file in the memory.
When download or upload occur the mistake or ceasing
A)To check USB cable whether shed off from the PC or the player.
B)Is exhaust the battery? Please replace the new battery. "
 
I read through it at length and finally notice a bit in the miniscule printed manual about "Drag in Windows explorer MP3 data to the external driver"  Couldn't be that easy could it?  Yes it could, I had earlier been attempting to format the external drive!

So what's currently on it? Some Tinariwen, saw a bit of them on BBC 4 at Womad and was impressed enough to download some tunes. Also have some Traffic and some Rammstein.

posted by timesnewroman at 10:56 AM  

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Saturday, July 24, 2004

Went to a brilly wedding yesterday. Two young people that I have known for a long time. They met via the Woodcraft Folk group that I am involved in, a good number of years ago and here they are married. Fantastic shindig to boot, no expense spared an opportunity to dance, chat, dance and dig the councillor up for the failings of New Labour. We shouldn't do it of course, I mean he even lost his position due to his opposition to endorsing PFI for a new-build school.  Did I forget to mention lashings of drink as well.

Originally I was supposed to be going to the whole shebang, but unfortunately a couple of extremely important meetings at work meant I had to go in and stay in.  Worse than that, one of them overran and it looked like I was going to miss the train, but there fate intervened and a colleague who lives near to the hotel that the wedding was taking place happened to pass by and give me an extremely lucky 30 odd mile lift. Got there before bride and groom and had an enjoyable if costly pint of Guinness.

Scarily txtd jimty at exactly the same time as he txtd me. How bizarre. He is off on holidays to Portugal and kindly sent a txt message to let me know that it was hot there.  Its fucking freezing here, cold, winy and rainy. July for chrissakes, more like March.


posted by timesnewroman at 12:58 PM  

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Thursday, July 22, 2004

Got a pleasant bit of unsolicited email today. Not spam, rather an email from another blogger, cottagehospitalbulletin who happened upon mine by way of the blogger profile. Turns out that not only have we both read The Wasp Factory, but we have similar interests and live in the same town. That's 3 Irvine Bloggers that I know, is this some kind of record?? Is Irvine the blog capital of the world?

posted by timesnewroman at 4:29 PM  

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Violent Cold Wind or Australian Aborigine Rite of Passage? 

We were having a coffee table discussion at work about motors, VeryGood has a Ford Focus, which Phedra claimed not to like the shape of.  I remembered reading somewhere that the Focus was so called because  the focus group established to decide the name couldn't come up with one. Phedra, who has been looking at motors for some time now with a view to purchase, following the demise of trusty rusty Escort, eventually has found a good deal on the above model.  He decides to look up the dictionary to find out what it means. 2 of them together  are obviously an island, however 1 on its own is either a "violent cold wind on the Adriatic" or an "Australian aboriginal rite of passage into adulthood."  His colleagues suspect its the latter.

posted by timesnewroman at 7:19 AM  

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Tuesday, July 20, 2004

Cultural Revolution Poster 
 
A Day in the Burrell (well an afternoon anyway)
 
After dining alfresco on the terrace, thewife and I spent an enjoyable Glasgow Fair Monday at the Burrell Collection. the wife is a bit of a sinofile, bless her, so we went to visit an new exhibition entitled One Million Days in China, there's an online version as well. Thoroughly enjoyable day out and entirely free, except for the fulfilled desire of having to pop into Sainsbury's on the way home.
 
Sunday night's quiz was cancelled due to the proprietor of the King's being at the Open Golf thingy, which meant that no-one had the key to the office to uplift the specially faxed questions. This meant that thewife and I had to satisfy our question cravings by watching both Mastermind and University Challenge and doing not at all to badly.

posted by timesnewroman at 5:37 AM  

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Sunday, July 18, 2004

Its been so long since I have been able to get in here I forget how to use this bloody thing. An Blogger have gone and put tons of new features so that you can make it look like a dog's breakfast.
 
My ISP provider has been refusing to let me in for the past few days. I am most annoyed and shan't be paying them this month.
 
Glasgow Fair weekend. Traditional holiday fortnight of weegies and I get Monday off which means I can drink plenty at the Kings tonight and not worry about the consequences in the morning.
 
thewife and I went to the neighbours' wedding reception on Friday and a fine event it was too. I have never seen so many tattooed women though. Some really ugly tattoos on some pretty ugly women. I don't mind tattoos and I don't mind them on women, I just wish that there was some sort of aesthetic control or ban on them showing the gross ones off. 

posted by timesnewroman at 8:25 AM  

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Monday, July 12, 2004

Its Monday and I'm off on a flexi day. Great system, come in early or stay late outwith core hours of 08:45 and 12:00 and 14:00 and 16:45 and you can build up time and take the odd day off. Just me and thewife at the quiz last night and got gubbed, but we don't really care, we are not under any circumstances going to watch Eastenders, ever, FULL STOP. Lady El will have to instead.

Its Mumsy's birthday, 74 and we are taking her out for lunch to someplace in Troon that thewife says is very nice.

I've been dipping into nostalgia, looking through vinyl collection and listening to Tasavallan Presidentti. No not the Finnish President, the 1970s cult Finnish Jazz Rock Progressive whatever you want to call it band. I still like it. So much so, that I've been hunting down that little beauty pictured below and I think I may have it.


I can feel a 70s Party coming on! 
posted by timesnewroman at 11:32 AM  

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Sunday, July 11, 2004

Remember this? 60s Room Decor 

Well that's it over and done with. For a brief moment whilst waiting for guests to arrive, thewife and I concurred that the waiting for people to come was the worst bit of a party. Then its suddenly all over. In the interim though we had a great time. Beaded entrance to the living room, pictures like above on walls, Jasmine joss sticks and candles in bottles. That was the scene, there was also an array of food for at least three other parties, which included wonderfully sophisticated grapefruit halves which were covered with cocktail sticks of cheese, pineapples and pickled onions. thewife wore cheesecloth, which she does anyway and had a wig with long hair and flowers in it. I went for a surf theme. The living room music was a classic selection of the Beatles, Stones, Kinks, Hollies, Troggs, Petula, Sandie (with knickers), Small Faces, Jefferson Airplane, Scott McKenzie and the Walker Brothers to name but a few. For the kitchen, just in case, I had a very different theme, Dick Dale and the Del Tones, The Ventures, Link Wray, The Chantays, Jim Messina and the Jesters, which very much influenced my look. I must admit I had a whale of a time tracking these boys down and if Rediski's very good, I may send him a copy.

The guest numbers were quite small, partly because we didn't invite a lot of people, going for the quality rather than quantity approach and some people didn't make it along. Nevertheless some folks did get into the scene and the wiccan hippy chick and banjo plucking partner won first prize for dress. Despite the fact that it was their normal clothes they were wearing.

All in all it was a hoot, but far too much Chilli left. We'll be eating it for days. Not that I mind of course, well except for the veggie stuff.
posted by timesnewroman at 4:38 PM  

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Friday, July 09, 2004

Sandie Shaw's Knickers 

The apprentice is quite a character. He has been around the block a number of times. 60s Glasgow gang member, Plumber, Bus Conductor, Silver Service Waiter, Social Worker, Royal Navy Petty Officer (He fought the Cod and the Cod Won) amongst countless other jobs, you name it he's probably done it. He's been a mod a rocker a hippy and god knows what else.

Occasionally he regales us with the odd tale, not boastful, just a tale. Today it was of whilst living and working in London in the sixties, him and his companion were driving around and happened to pass by a woman outside a house who looked like Sandie Shaw. They did a double take, drove past again and confrimed that it was indeed Sandie Shaw. She was loading luggage into her car and then walked back up a very long driveway to her house. The apprentice and companion, chancers that they were, contemplated the opportunity to steal the luggage and drive off with it. They could probably have got away with it he reckons. So he sat there telling us this story and then pondered the worth of Sandie's underwear. A fortune I reckon.
posted by timesnewroman at 7:52 PM  

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Monday, July 05, 2004

Sunday afternoon, weather rather nice and I finally tackle a couple of jobs which I have not been able to do because the weathers been too crap or I have had something more important to do, like undergo a lobotomy.

Strimmed the underside of the window, weeded the driveway and took a hacksaw to a wild and imperialistic Cotoneaster shrub, which threatend to cover the entire garden.

Then I was able to sit with a pint of Rock's organic orange at our patio table and relax for a short while before preparing for the night's quiz.

Would you believe those Greeks. Former travelling companion at work got Greece in the sweep at the start of the competition, asked me what chance she had. None I said in all honesty and conviction at the time. My own competition, no humble sweep for us, a far more manly task of skill and daring which involved the prediction of all the results and awarded 5 points for exact scores and 2 points for results. 37 participants � 2.00 per head and Mr Stupid here organises it so that prizes are as follows. 70% of takings to 1st place, 25% to second place and 5% Booby Prize. Needless to say I came 3rd. No Prize. Nada.

The world cup beckons. Electronic entries only and an administration fee methinks.

posted by timesnewroman at 4:39 PM  

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Sunday, July 04, 2004

We are having a 1960s theme party next Saturday. Period costume optional, but encouraged. I spend some time gathering together a series of iconographic 60s images for the invitations. I'm suitably chuffed with the end result and shows it to wife. She says that the picture I have of Marilyn Monroe is from the 7 Year Itch which was released in 1955. I say you're probably the only person I know that knows that! Nevertheless back to drawing board just in case.


Open Invite. 
posted by timesnewroman at 4:11 PM  

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Thursday, July 01, 2004

Blood Pressure is just about to blow. I have been arsing about for the past hour trying to connect to my broadband service, just as I have for the past week and not getting very far at all. When I do connect it chucks me out when it feels like it. Their service desk of course closes at 6.00pm, about 5 mins after I get in now that I let the train take the strain. At least I don't get traffic stress no more. I am home early tomorrow though and they better be able to help or they can take their pile of cheap cable shite and stuff it.

I'm not bitter about the Czech Republic's defeat. Well maybe a bit. I finally thought I should put some dosh on them, �1 Czechs to win 2-0 Baros to score first after Reidski won some cash on Portugal and Ronaldo. Still more exciting than the lottery and better odds too.

What is it about the Greeks then, totally unfancied and here they are in the Final. All you need are some players who aren't world class, get a German manager in to do the thinking and the organising and hey presto! World Cup is suddenly looking good. What do you think the odds would be for Scotland to reach the Semis then?

Oh and I had fish for dinner 4 hours ago and I haven't been to the loo yet. Things could be looking up.

Oh and there is a bug going around. Not only has Reidski started a Blog, now so has the Radical Postman. Trendsetter me.
posted by timesnewroman at 9:44 PM  

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